Broken
by ht23987
Summary: Bella is distraught after Edward left her. But what happens when she visits the Cullen's home, and finds a Cullen who is there as well?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these these characters. All rights for their creation go to Stephenie Meyer.**

Life seemed meaningless to me right now. The brilliant light that used to shine down on me was once filled with color; sparkling with my joy. Thousands of tiny diamonds that resembled a vampires skin in the light was a nice example. But now it was bleak, meaningless, and dark. I felt like I had no purpose. No meaning. No future. Edward was supposed to be my future. My lifeline that was just cut recently, leaving me stranded, and trying to bring myself back. Could I even bring myself back? I felt like an empty pit of nothingness; my stomach an empty black hole that sucked every bit of happiness from the world into it, before I can even experience it.

My heart felt empty, as if it weren't beating at all. But it was impossible to ignore its aching hard beat whenever my memories get the best of me. With Edward still gone, nightmares continued to haunt me each night. The sight of him, standing at a distance, just enough that I could see him, was enough to drive me into madness. I would call for him, but he wouldn't wait. He just left me there, letting the dark consume me. I awoke to my screams, hearing them echo throughout my room. The bloodcurdling shrieks would send Charlie charging into my room. But he couldn't comfort me when he came. I would just let my miserable tears wash my face until I fell asleep once more.

The hole in my chest continued to grow, day by day; the black hole eating everything in its path. Just thinking about him sends a pang of sadness that radiates through me, feeling like a thousand knives stabbing into my skin. I missed Edward. I wanted him to come back, and tell me that everything he said was a lie. I wanted him to come tell me he loved me, and that he would never hurt me again. But even I knew that was impossible. He said it himself, he didn't love me. He didn't want me. So why was it so hard for me to move on? I let myself hope. It never made sense for him to love me. Someone as beautiful and amazing as he was wasn't meant for an awkward girl like me. I should have known that from the beginning.

I sat alone, staring out the window to my room, pushing memories out of my mind. A single tear streaked down my cheek, as I tried to forget. I was debating on whether to go see Jacob or not; he made me feel better at least. We had just started working on motorcycles, that I wasn't even sure he could fix. It didn't matter. They were just excuses for me to go see him. At least then I can let go, forget, and be happy. I angrily bit my lip, as my fingers tapped on the windowsill. Giving up, I walked out of my room, and down the stairs. Charlie was laying on the couch, watching another baseball game.

"Hey Bells," he called.

I could see the pure worry in his chocolate brown eyes. I scared the hell out of him each night, due to my screams and wails as I went through my nightmares. He thought I was broken beyond repair, no doubt. I sure felt broken.

"Hey," I whispered, my voice cracking.

"Where are you going?" he asked, as I grabbed my car keys.

"Down to La Push. I'm going to go see Jake again."

His eye crinkling smile lit up, as a small fraction of the worry lifted. "Alright. See you later, Bells."

I nodded, ducking out the door. I slowly trudged over to my truck, as it drizzled. Clouds covered the sky, darkening the day. I crawled into my warm truck, sitting on the tan leather seat, inhaling it's smell of tobacco and a fresh hint of peppermint. I started it up, the loud rumbling filling the air. I started to drive, making my way to Jacob. My mouth was a hard line, as I twisted through town, trying to think about the future, not my past. Finally, I arrived at Jake's, a small wave of relief flowing through me. I could forget now. My truck pulled to a stop in front of the house. I yanked the door to my truck open, jumping out. I walked to the door, knocking. A few moments later, the door opened. Billy Black was sitting there, in his wheelchair.

His dark eyes brightened when they saw me, his smile soft. His hair was laying flat, down past his shoulders. The dark black color matched Jake's.

"Hi, Billy," I smiled.

He returned it, his dark eyes warm. "Hey Bella. Jacob!" he called, "Bella's here."

Within seconds, I saw Jacob jog to the door."Hey Bella!" he said, enthusiastically.

Before I could reply, he nearly knocked me over with a hug. His strong arms were so tight, I couldn't breathe.

"Hey Jake," I gasped, after he released me.

"Ready to go work on some bikes?" he asked, starting towards the garage.

I chuckled, and nodded. I followed him over to the garage, as he opened it up.

"So how are things?" he asked, kneeling down to the floor. He started working, his eyes focused on the bike.

"With what?" I asked, eyebrows furrowing.

"You. Are you feeling any better?"

I looked down, meeting his wise brown eyes. He knew me well. Or perhaps I was just not acting happy enough. He knew I was hurting. But I wasn't sure if he knew how bad.

"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to play it off.

"Well, you seemed pretty down after the Cullen's left." _Shit! I have been acting depressed! _"I was wondering if you were starting to feel better. Dad told me that Charlie's been real worried."

It felt as if he slapped me across his face. "It's been… better," I lied, biting my lip.

"You sure?" he whispered, his dark eyes narrowing.

"Yeah, I'm sure." I threw him the brightest smile I could muster.

"Alright, good. I didn't like them Cullen's much, anyway." He grinned, flashing his brilliant white teeth.

I shrugged, like I didn't care. Jake started to work, not speaking until he asked me to hand him a wrench. I was personally glad he dropped the topic of the Cullen's.

The day continued, as I helped hand Jacob different tools and parts. He seemed like he was in his own world, working diligently, his long hair pulled back into a ponytail by a rubber band. When it started to get late, I realized I had to leave. Part of me wanted to stay, because I knew what I would think of if I left. And I most certainly didn't want that.

"Alright, Jake. I guess I have to get going," I whispered.

"Kay. Come back tomorrow, okay?" he grinned.

"Okay. Goodnight."

I walked outside the garage, the world only slightly lit by the setting sun. I climbed into my truck, sadly turning off the radio. I wasn't in the mood to hear music. I began driving, not really wanting to go home. I couldn't help how my thoughts fell back on the Cullen's once again. It was like they were permanently burned into my brain. It felt horrible. I just… wanted to see them one last time. They all left so suddenly, leaving me without a single memory. The only place I could go that was even remotely connected to them was… their home.

My truck swerved, instantly going in a different direction. I had to see it. Their house. Just one last time. My truck's engine hissed, as I pushed the speed over sixty. Trees were on all sides of me, as I started on the path to the Cullen's house. My heart thumped out of my chest, as I wondered if I would be able to take seeing it. Tears were already blurring my vision from the familiar route. My heart stuttered, when the house came into view. My breath caught in my throat, as I saw a dim light on in one of the windows. I slammed on the breaks, hurriedly jumping out of my truck.

I ran forward, finding the door was unlocked. I stumbled inside, seeing all of the furniture was still here. _Were they moving back?_ I couldn't help but wonder this. I gulped, the tears brimming over, as I stared at the room. At his piano. At the staircase that dominated one side of the room. I slowly walked over, sitting down on one side of the couch. I didn't understand how the light was on. But I didn't want to go looking around. It would hurt me even more. I slight sob escaped my lips, as my chest heaved. All of these memories…

"Bella?"

I gasped, my head whipping over to the staircase. Blood flooded into my cheeks, my breaths accelerating. I met the two golden eyes that were staring at me in wonder. I was paralyzed on the couch, held by the hypnotic eyes. Without another thought, I jumped up, nearly running to the stairs. I stumbled on one of the stairs, right as two strong arms caught me. I crashed into his chest, my chest heaving as more sobs passed through my lips.

"Bella?" he asked again, worry lacing his words.

I pulled back to look at him. Jasper. The first Cullen I have seen in far too long. Seeing him felt like a life raft, holding me afloat for a just a bit longer. Reassurance and comfort. His eyes were a bright gold, extremely light. He probably just went hunting, which was good. His gold hair was messy and shaggy. I noticed how his mouth was a slight frown; disapproving it seemed.

"Are you okay, darlin'?" he whispered.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, my voice shaking. I ignored his question.

I was beginning to tremble, my heart holding an extra beat. It was so nice to just see one of the Cullen's. See the pale skin, and feel the coolness of their skin. I was home.

"I should ask you the same question," he breathed, exasperated. "But I was just coming back to pick up some of my things. Alice only picked out some of my things to bring along," he grumbled.

"I am so happy to see you," I cried, tears continuing to fall from my face. I knew I was probably scaring him. I was a mental wreck, and it was clear he could see it. My odd smile probably made me look truly insane.

He stared at me for a few minutes, until a soft smile pulled across his face. "Are you alright?" he asked.

He had noticed. I look totally psycho right now. I frowned, looking up at him.

"Yes… just a little shocked," I whispered.

"I can tell," he laughed. "Come, lets sit over here," he said, sitting on one of the couches. "You know, Alice and Edward might get angry that I am talking to you. But I don't really care right now. You're a wreck aren't you?" he whispered, sitting down across from me.

I blushed. "Is it that easy to tell?"

I knew it was. Black shadows were under my eyes, and my hair was tousled and frizzy. I was even paler than before, and I am sure my emotions are haywire. He smiled sweetly in reply.

"I felt your emotions when you came in here… you were distraught," he sighed, his eyes narrowing.

I frowned, looking down at the carpet. "It's been… rough."

"I'm sorry, Bella… it's really all my fault." His shoulders slumped, as he shut his eyes.

"No it isn't." I didn't need him feeling bad! He was making me happy!

He looked up, his eyes challenging. "If I hadn't lunged at you on your birthday Edward wouldn't have made us leave," he growled.

"He would have found a reason later on," I sighed. It was only true.

He pursed his lips, a slight chuckle coming out of his mouth. "Maybe you're right."

We were quiet for a minute, neither of us saying a word. I finally broke the silence. "How is _he_?" I asked.

Jasper's eyes narrowed. "I don't know. I haven't talked to him since the… um… accident. I have been staying with some old friends of mine. Alice has been stayed with me for a bit, but she has been off of her own, doing different stuff as well." He looked angered, slightly, and partially confused.

"How long are you going to stay?" I asked, my voice no higher than a whisper.

"I was planning on leaving tonight," he replied, pursing his lips.

My entire body froze, making me feel ice in my veins. My eyes were wide open, falling to the floor. No. No, no, no. I started to hyperventilate, not wanting to loose my only tie to the Cullen's.

"Wow, Bella, calm down," Jasper gasped, quickly moving closer to me. Not too close, not wanting to get tempted by my blood. I then wondered how hard it was for him when I hugged him.

"I'm s-sorry," I stuttered, my eyes watering.

"You really are broken now…" he breathed, avoiding my eyes. I could clearly see the guilt in them.

"Jasper… will you stay for a little? Just a couple of days, please," I begged.

A wave of calm went through me. "I will stay for a bit…" he mumbled, clearly not liking the idea. "Leaving would be quite cruel of me. Although I don't really understand why you want _me_ to stay, of all people.

"You were my friend, Jasper. I have missed all of you," I choked out.

His eyes softened, his lips twitching as he smiled. "I thought you thought of me as the creepy sideline vampire of the family," he chuckled.

I shook my head. "No. I liked you just the same as the rest of the family," I replied. And it was true. In fact, I believe I like him more than Rosalie.

He smiled wider. "Thanks, darlin'. I appreciate that."

I smiled in reply. It was the first time in so long that I have truly smiled. I looked outside, to see how dark it was becoming.

"Would you like to stay the night here, Bella?" he asked, his country drawl coming out.

I nodded, beaming at him. "I'll call Charlie real quick, tell him I'm with Jacob."

"Jacob?" Jasper asked, his eyebrows furrowing.

"He's my friend down at La Push. He's been the most… supportive," I murmured.

Jasper nodded, not asking anymore. I pulled out my cell phone, not daring to walk out of this room. Jasper could disappear like a mirage. I dialed Charlie's number, not taking my eyes off of him.

Finally, things were turning around. But the thing I was wondering… was for how long?


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these these characters. All rights for their creation go to Stephenie Meyer.**

I was gracious that Charlie thought I was staying with Jacob for the night. He sounded happy, and more than anything, relieved. I guess he took note to the happier edge to my voice. I was already beginning to feel better. Seeing Jasper calmed me down, and let me remember that the wonderful world that had existed a few months ago was real. Perhaps he was just using his gift on me. But I sure felt better. Not hole; I was still partially broken. Not even Jasper could fix that. But certainly better.

Jasper sat on the chair, while I laid back on the couch. The TV was on, but neither of us were watching. I would sneak glances at him, a smile twitching on my lips. He looked worried, his eyebrows pushed together as he thought. Was he worrying what Alice and Edward would think? If I were him, I wouldn't care. He could make his own decisions. I wanted to speak to him, but I didn't know what to say. I didn't know Jasper very well, so there wasn't much I could say.

"Was he… mad at you?" I whispered. It was the only thing I could think of.

Memories of my last birthday flushed into my mind, but I shook them away.

"Extremely," Jasper chuckled without humor. "He hasn't spoken to me since," he added, his eyes on the floor. "I really am sorry, Bella. I should have controlled myself better," he whispered, balling up his fists.

"Don't put yourself down. You're still new to this way of life. And if you ask me, you're doing pretty good," I smiled.

He looked up at me, his gold eyes full of wonder. "Why are you being so forgiving?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Because I understand that it was just an accident. And I don't blame you for Edward leaving. He said it himself, he didn't love me anymore."

Jasper's eyes widened. "He said that?" he gasped. I nodded, my eyes drooping a smidge. "Wow. That I didn't know. He never mentioned falling out of love with you before. In fact, I saw him act the happiest while he was with you."

"He said that he shouldn't have let it go on for so long," I choked out, staring at Jasper in misery.

A wave of calm went through me. "I can't believe it…" Jasper whispered, truly shocked.

"Now do you understand why I was so… upset?" I whispered, my eyes watering. "I mean, I don't even have a picture of any of you guys, let alone him. He took them all," I whispered.

Jasper's eyes narrowed, his mouth an angry line. "I need to speak with him about this. Never did I think he could be so…" Jasper struggled to find the word.

"Cruel? Selfish? Harsh?" I offered.

"All three."

I sighed again, trying to get my mind off of him again.

"So," Jasper murmured, looking over at me. "You have been hanging around friends still, so that's good. Although you only mentioned Jacob… do you still speak with Jessica and Angela?" he asked.

My eyes widened, shocked that he knew their names, let alone remembered. "I honestly don't speak with them much anymore," I whispered, biting my lip.

"Why not?"

"I haven't really spoken to anyone, Jasper… other than Jake."

I looked up, meeting his eyes that were filled with pity. It was silent again, neither of us thinking about anything to say. Finally, I drifted to sleep on the couch.

I awoke in the morning, feeling more than refreshed. This is the best nights sleep I have gotten in a long time. I opened my eyes, to see Jasper still sitting on the chair. He smiled, his eyes soft.

"Mornin'," he grinned.

"Good morning," I replied, returning the smile. "I slept great last night," I added.

He nodded. "Guess I kind of am responsible for that," he chuckled.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Your emotions turned a few times… you started to panic while you were sleeping. I calmed you down though…" he mumbled.

"Oh." I pursed my lips, avoiding his eyes.

"What happens?" Jasper asked. "While you dream."

"It's mainly of…him. Walking away and leaving in the dark. I scare Charlie each night due to my screaming…" my voice trailed off.

I was telling Jasper everything. Yet I barely knew him. But personally… I didn't care at the moment.

_Jasper's Point of View_

I stared at Bella, my eyebrows furrowed as I tried to make out what she was thinking. She was so messed up… so screwed up since Edward left. I personally wanted to go and rip his head off. A man should never mess with a girls feelings… I mean, after all she did for him! She accepted the fact that he was a vampire. She even wanted to be a vampire for him. And what does he do? Leaves her after he tells her all the things he said meant nothing. It was worse than kicking a puppy.

"I wish I could make you forget," I said, suddenly.

She frowned, and stared down at the floor. "Even though I hate this feeling… I never want to forget that. It was the best time of my life…" she whispered.

I felt the spike in her emotions, as her depressed feelings increased. Her eyebrows raised up, as her eyes watered. I honestly wished I could comfort her. To tell her that everything would be okay in the end. But after what I did… I don't think she would even want me to be near her. Suddenly, my phone vibrated. Pursing my lips, I reached down and took it out of my pocket. I bit my lip, seeing it was from Alice.

"Who is it?" she whispered, her lips not even moving.

"Alice," I replied, sounding almost the same as her. This wasn't going to be good. "I'll only be a moment," I whispered, walking out of the room. I took an unnecessary breath, then put the phone up to my ear. "Hello?" I asked, trying to sound normal.

"Jasper," Alice growled into the phone, anger ringing through her voice. "What are you doing with Bella? Do you know how angry Edward would be if he knew of this?" she hissed.

I sighed, shutting my eyes. Sometimes her and her visions got on my nerves. "Alice, you don't understand… how broken this poor girl is. She needs someone. And I just can't abandon her at the moment. I promised I would stay a couple of days," I replied, preparing myself for a fight.

"What were you doing back there anyway?" she asked.

"I came to get some of my things; half of what you forgot to take."

"Jasper, I only took what you needed. Now look would you have done," she grumbled on the other end of the phone.

My mouth slightly fell open. "I have done nothing wrong," I hissed. "If you could see the pure misery on her face, you would have stayed too, Alice! Not to mention how I can feel everything she can. She's depressed, and I'm worried that if I leave too soon… she'll do something drastic."

"It sounds like she's lost her mind."

I stared at the phone in shock. "What is wrong with you?" I snarled. "Do you not understand that she has lost someone she loved? Edward flat out told her that she meant nothing to him. That everything he said to her was a lie. How would you feel if you heard that?" I challenged.

"Forget it Jasper. So you will be leaving tomorrow?" she asked.

"That is my plan," I replied. Hopefully I can make Bella feel better by then. But if not, plans can change.

"Edward is to never know of this… although I would like to talk to him about what he said to Bella.

"No. I am going to speak to him about that in person. I don't care if he knows I'm here," I laughed.

"Well if you do, I'm coming with you. It could get nasty."

"Okay," I replied.

"I'll talk to you later, Jasper. Bye, love you!" she said, sounding happier.

"Love you, too, Alice."

I shut the phone, walking back into the sitting room. Bella was on the couch, a blanket covering her. She looked up at me as I entered the room.

"Was Alice mad?" she asked.

"Very," I chuckled. "But she can get over it."

"I kind of… overheard some of the conversation," she mumbled, looking down. "You're leaving tomorrow?" she asked, looking up at me with those big, doe eyes.

I blinked a few times, not knowing how to reply. "That is the plan, yes."

Her eyes watered, as she nodded. "Okay, that's fine."

"No, you're sad," I replied, instantly feeling the remorse in her emotions.

"Well if that is as long as you can stay, than it's fine. I just appreciate you coming at all," she said, smiling sweetly.

Her sadness was growing, and I could feel it. What can I do? If I stayed longer, Alice would be pissed. If I left, Bella would be all alone, facing the world.

What should I do?

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